By Kristy

Artist

Cheesecake I’ve Tried (NYC)

1. Paris Baguette: Fluffy, almost angel food cake-y

2. Breads: At first glance and feel it looks too dense, but looks are deceiving, the melt-in-your-mouth feeling is addictive…lemony

3. Fairway: This one got rave reviews from Serious Eats but it tastes like it’s from a grocery store

4. Venieros: you envision a brick of cream cheese (not good)

5. Lady M: Whipped, silky.

6. Juniors: (you envision a brick of cream cheese)

7. Two Little Red Hens: This is the cheesecake imagine the one in Friends to taste like.  The New York Cheesecake fully actualized.  Creamy, but neither suffocatingly heavy nor rule-breakingly light (I love light Asian cheesecakes but they’re kinda cheating…of course cheesecake tastes good if you completely overhaul it).  Perfectly tanned with the perfect hint of lemon and the perfect graham cracker crust

Need to Try:

Eileens famous cheesecake
Zabars
Chikalicious

Christmas Gifts are Stupid

The whole rush to have a gift ready precisely on December 25th is dumb.  A gift given before or after that date should have just as much meaning.  What is this social embarrassment of not having a gift prepared on December 25th? The romanticism of rushing through department stores (or more likely, feverishly selecting express shipping from the dropdown menu) on December 24th is a complete waste of resources.   Think of all the harried post office workers rushing around instead of spending time with THEIR family because you couldn’t make the time to make a decision in time –frankly I think that means you don’t care enough (hell, good intentions, etc.) so why don’t you just show up empty-handed because those are your true feelings anyway.

What is this odd ceremony? This systematic dance that we engage in year after year? Only to return the crap on December 26th. Otherwise the stuff settles at the bottom of  clear plastic storage containers bought from The Container Store.  What a waste of labor, of energy, of material.

The Only Acceptable Reason to Have Voted for Trump

Is that you were so desperate for change, in such a dire life threatening situation where that for whatever reason the current political system wasn’t working for you.  You’re unemployed and uninsured and have been stuck in this institutionalized hole for a few presidents.

(In which case I am sorry to say that I don’t think Trump is going to help.  You, dear sir were indubitably duped)

Right off the bat unacceptable reasons:

–lower tax rates
–lower insurance premiums
–racism
–Hillary’s voice
–Hillary’s corruption (because Donald Trump’s is worse)
–Anyone but Hillary
–Bill Clinton
–Trump as a businessman (he’s a lousy one)

 

 

 

 

Hot Chocolate I’ve Tried NYC

*Bolded are the ones I like*

1. Vosges (Thick drinking chocolate literally liquid chocolate)
2. Eataly (tiny cup of thick drinking chocolate almost pudding-like)
3. Laduree (milky frothy like a deluxe hot cocoa
4. Zabars (milky but deep chocolatey taste)
5. Le Pain Quotidien (tastes like dark chocolate with milk not sweet)
6. Starbuck (tastes like dark chocolate with milk but a little sweet, not dimensional)
7. Dunkin Donuts (sweet and milky reminds me of preschool pajama parties the where they served hot chocolate with marshmallows in those paper cups with winged handles)
8. Balthazar (nothing special, tastes like Starbucks or Le Pain Quotidien milk with cocoa powder tasting)
9. Fresco Gelateria in the East Village (milky and frothy similar to Dunkin Donuts and Laduree)
10. City Bakery (Thick and Pudding-like with that infamous marshmallow…drink slowly otherwise you might barf)
11. 2Beans (thick drinking chocolate…I don’t know why I don’t like it I think it just tastes like a bar of melted dark chocolate and the cup is too big given the heaviness of the hot chocolate)

Chocolate Chip Cookies I’ve Tried NYC

1. Culture (New York Cafe cookie fully actualized, thick, encompasses all three textures crispy, chewy, fudgy pockets of chunk)
2. Jacque Torres (thin disc-like crispy chewy melty chocolate swirled thorughout rather than pockets of chunks)
3. Levain (Scone-like, cakelike)
4. Dominque Ansel (Chewy, Fudgy.  The cookie is chunky and so are the chunks).
5. Breads Bakery
6. Insomnia Cookies (average cookie mix type cookie)

 

Need to Try
1. Maman
2. Untitled at the Whitney
3. Bouchon Bakery
4. Ovenly
5. City Bakery
6. Baked

Sense of Self aka We Are Just Programmed Robots

I was listening to the Fresh Air episode about sense of self, about how there are people that have these super rare disorders that make them think they are dead, or that their own arm is a gross extra appendage.

 

And while I have heard of these disorders before, it sort of blew my mind. I dunno, it just felt like humans are just mechanical bodies and our minds are just software.  most of the time the software is inputted correctly and we can go about our business. working, playing, busying ourselves for the duration of our battery life.  But sometimes the software is glitchy. We are Legos. We are SIMS.

It just makes it feel like whatever free will we thought we had simply the result of correctly inputted software.

Personal Jewelry Ideas

they’re not original, they’re not what I want to sell, but they’re dainty little things that remind me of gum ball machines and cereal box prizes and being a Williamsburg to Big Sur transplant you know those ladies with straight brunette hair and striped shirts and a swipe of garnet-red lipstick and lots of houseplants.

1. Bezel Set Garnet Heart gold Ring
2. Bezel Set Diamond Heart gold Ring
3. Pastel Rainbow Pave Ring
4. Crisp Gold Tag Bracelet
5. Crisp Gold Tag Necklace
6. Bezel Set Round Diamond Ring
7. 6 prong Tiny Emerald Ring
8. Coin disc dangle Bracelet
9. Tiny Gold Ring Necklace on silver chain
10. Tiny puffed heart in gold, platinum, or rose gold
11. Tiny puffed heart in platinum or rose gold paved with diamonds
12.  Tiny gold ball station necklace
12. gold ball with chain looped around it bracelet
13. Horizon circle necklace in silver
14. Horizon circle necklace in gold
15. Horizon circle necklace in silver and gold
16. linked gold rings ring
17. completely round thin wire bangle
18. completely square bangle
19. six prong pink diamond ring
20. tiny gold box chain bracelet

Mainstream Fancy Restaurants in NYC

You know, the ones that the Kardashians would go to

1. Marea
2. Le Cirque
3. Le Bernadin
4. Minetta Tavern
5. Spotted Pig
6. Nobu
7. 11 Madison Park
8. Gotham Grill
9. Koi
10. Cipriani
11. Jean Georges
12. Daniel
13. Mr. Chows
14. Per Se
15. Masa
16. Bouley
17. Blue Hill
18. Peter Luger Steak House
19. Gotham Bar & Grill
20. La Grenouille
21. Union Square Cafe
22. Ai Fiori
23. Wolfgang’s Steakhouse
24. Aquavit
25. Babbo